


Extreme Heart In The Mountains

by flyflyhighup



Category: Point Break (2015)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-07
Updated: 2016-05-22
Packaged: 2018-06-07 00:23:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6776602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flyflyhighup/pseuds/flyflyhighup
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Utah crashes while trying to arrest Bodhi. This leads to the beginning of a secret love, when Utah is forced to confront his hidden desires. Utah's POV.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Breaking The Cover

” Bodhi, freeze! FBI!” 

This was the time to finally break my cover. I couldn’t let him go on with this and murder all the people carrying gold from the mines just because of his obsession with the Ozaki Eight and saving the ecology. All the masquerade was over. I was an FBI agent, he was a criminal and it was my obligation to arrest him. So why was it so hard? Why was it so hard to point my gun at him? My hands were shaking. I had to do what I had to do. 

” Can’t let you do it, brother! ” I yelled, watching him still holding the detonator. ” Damnit, Bodhi, drop it!” 

Bodhi watched me strangely, fearlessly. I believe that like me, he knew I could never shoot at him. Without blinking an eye, he hit the button and dropped the device, as if obeying my order ironically. Loud blasts thundered somewhere in the mines and I knew it was too late. Enormous rock blocks were already rolling down the mountain, about to bury the upturned cars and people inside them. In one fluent movement Bodhi put on a helmet, hopped on his dirt bike and raced away. He managed to do what he wanted. He always managed everything and I knew that if I let him go now, he’ll be nowhere to be found. I couldn’t save those unfortunates who happened to cross Bodhi’s path today, but I could still stop him from harming more people. 

I leaped on the other bike and dashed after him. Through the thick cloud of dust and dirt created by the falling stones behind us I could barely see his black bike. For a single second he turned his head and sped up, apparently noticing me behind him. When we both ended up on two separate rocks further away from the place of the disaster, I thought I had him trapped. I confronted him with the truth that had always been in the back of my head, from the minute I saw him. 

" It was you the whole time! Mumbai, Africa, Mexico. Everytime! ” 

Slowly he turned his head to look at me. There was still no fear in his eyes. His voice was muffled by his helmet. 

" If you really wanted to know, all you had to do was ask. " 

He twisted the throttle swiftly, the bike sprang to life and jumped over the cliffs into the forest. I couldn’t lose him. Motorbiking was my strong point, but here everything slowed me down. The branches of trees whipped my body and shielded my vision, the moss, soft soil and wet leaves kept the bike from going as fast as I wanted it to. 

Our bikes bounced over the stumps and other forest obstacles, Bodhi still ahead of me. I saw his tense figure controlling the bike as if it was a part of him, his black jacket glistening when hit by the few sunbeams that were able to pass through the dense forest. Never once did he look back again to see if I was still following him.

The following things happened so fast I’m not even sure I remember them correctly. The front wheel of my bike got caught in some twisted roots standing out of the floor of the forest. Then I flew and sharp pain arranged itself in my body – head first, followed by elbows, knees and back. Through the cracked face shield of my helmet I could blurrily see the tops of the trees which meant I was not falling anymore. Something warm was streaming down my neck. I lay motionless between bushes and fallen branches. I wasn’t able to get up and follow Bodhi anymore, so he was gone. He still had two ordeals left to complete all eight. My mind circled rapidly. Maybe somebody will find me, this was the last thought I can remember before passing out. 

My head seemed to be split in half when I opened my eyes. The wet, muddy forest was gone and I was lying in dry and clean sheets. The wooden bed was comfortable and for a minute I thought that I’m at my home and everything that happened was nothing but a bad dream. However, pain that followed my every movement was a clear evidence that it was reality. There was a bandage around my head and I didn’t know this place I was in. Walls, ceiling, floor, furniture, everything was made of wood. Through the window pane I could see the darkening horizon, so apparently it was evening. 

The place was quiet and before I could figure out whether or not I was alone in here, my tossing and turning was heard. The floorboards creaked, somebody was coming. The door opened just when I turned my head and I didn’t expect to see what I saw. 

Bodhi stood in the doorframe, with his arms crossed over his chest. He watched me with a dark gaze. I stared back without saying a word.

” FBI, huh?” 

His voice was quiet and coarse. These words made me forget about my injuries for a minute. The realization came over me like a lightning. The reason he brought me here. He didn’t want to save me. I was a traitor. I had to pay for it. 

” You disappointed me, brother. A lot.” 

I swallowed saliva to clear my dry throat.

” You’re going to kill me now, aren’t you?” 

” No. Why?” 

” Isn’t that why I’m here?” 

” You’re here because you fell hard while chasing me.” 

I breathed deeply. Really? I betrayed him and now he was going to nurse me back to health?

” I thought you left.” 

Bodhi moved and came closer to me. He was dressed in shorts and a grey tank top that revealed his tattooed, muscled arms. 

” Come on, Johnny, if I really wanted to run away from you, I’d do it and you know it. I turned back when I saw you landing on your head.” 

He checked my bandage carefully, I could see he was trying hard not to hurt me. With him leaned over me, I could see some dark hair on his chest. 

” Where are we?” 

He kept silent for a while and straightened up. ” In a place meant for emergency necessities.” 

I sighed. These guys were clever as hell. They did everything near perfect, I should’ve guessed they had such secret hideouts in case something goes wrong. I sat up and threw the sheets away from me - I wore nothing, except my boxer briefs. I glared at him. 

” Did you undress me?” 

” Yes, of course. I had to see what else was injured, besides your head. Also, your clothes were all wet and dirty. Did you want me to put you in the bed like that?” Bodhi calmly answered. ” And lie down. Your head needs a rest now.” He lightly pushed my shoulders back down on the pillow. 

” I need to use the bathroom,” I insisted, wriggling out of the sheets. ” There is a bathroom here, right?” 

Bodhi nodded and gripped my elbow, helping me to stand up. Everything in my body hurt, as we left the room and slowly made our way towards the bathroom. Then I saw this was a small wooden cabin. It was dead quiet, except for the burning wood crackling in the fireplace. 

” Where are the others?” 

” We decided to separate for a while. But they are angry with you, I can tell you that.”

This didn’t surprise me. Roach and Grommet had always been reluctant about me being part of the team. I always felt like they could see right through my disguise and only tolerated me because Bodhi wanted them to. I didn’t even want to imagine what did they think of me now when they knew my true identity. 

The bathroom was very narrow. It only had a small bathtub and toilet. On the wall there was a medium sized mirror. When I was about to close the door, Bodhi held it. 

” What’s wrong?” 

” You might be dizzy. I don’t want you to fall down again.” 

” So you’re going to stand there?” 

” What’s the problem? Got something I haven’t seen?” He looked at me with poker face expression. 

Probably seeing my annoyed face, he turned his back at me. I took a leak as fast as I could, trying not to think about him being right there, less than two feet away from me.  
When I was done, Bodhi guided me back to the bed. He tucked me in the sheets like some caring mother. 

” Why are you doing this?” I asked. ” I betrayed you. All of you.” 

Bodhi looked up at me.” That’s not something you should worry about now.” He opened the drawer of the nightstand next to the bed and took out a small, white bottle. I looked at it suspiciously. 

” Don’t be afraid, I’m not trying to poison you,” Bodhi said, placing the bottle on the nightstand next to a glass of water.” It’s a painkiller. You might need it.” 

He walked to the door and stood there with his back at me.

” Call me if you need anything,” he said without turning around. Then he closed the door quietly and I could hear his footsteps walking away. 

I took one pill of the painkiller he left me and rested my head back into the pillow. This was weird. I thought I’ll never see him again. I thought he hated me for taking advantage of his desire to help me find my path. And now here I was, lying in his bed with him taking care of me as if I was his best friend which I knew I wanted to be. Even when he did terrible things, I always considered him my friend. 

A sweet, narcotic relaxation came over me. The painkiller kicked in and slowly I drifted away into sleep. The last thing I heard was the wind howling outside the windows of the cabin.


	2. Utah's Secret

Eventually I started to feel better. My wounds were healing and sometimes I wondered if I would recover that fast without Bodhi taking care of me. He acted like a real, unselfish friend. He cleaned my injuries. He cooked for me. He made sure the fire in the fireplace never went out to keep me warm. 

The cabin we were in was in such a remote mountain area that even FBI wouldn’t find me here. Little to no civilization for miles. No one else appeared. I had no idea where Grommet and Roach were and honestly, I wasn’t looking forward to meet them. In their minds I was an enemy now. A betrayer, an alien. I had no place in their world and they would never trust me again. Samsara... surely she also knew who I was. And after what we shared I’d be too ashamed to look her in the eye. 

That evening I was sitting on the sofa, wrapped in a blanket and watching the logs burning. The wind howled somewhere in the chimney and shook the window panes as much as it could. Bodhi came and sat down on the rug in front of the fire, one knee drawn up with his arms clasping it. He was shirtless which surprised me as the temperature wasn’t suitable. 

” What about the Ozaki 8?” I asked to interrupt the extended silence. 

” What about it?” 

” Well, what’s going to happen now?” 

Bodhi rolled a piece of paper between his fingers. ” We’ll continue on it as soon as you recover completely.” 

” I don’t think they’ll accept me again.” 

” They will. You might be some goddamn FBI agent, but you’re still our brother. You proved it. It’s a bond that cannot be broken this easily.” 

I was quiet for a while. ” I want to see Samsara.” 

Bodhi glanced at me. ” Why?” 

That was a weird question. He knew about me and Samsara. 

” I just miss her,” I shrugged. ” Has there never been a female that you missed?” 

He didn’t answer for a good while. Actually, I couldn’t imagine Bodhi in love. To me he was a great athlete, a super surfer, an eco warrior and a leader. His philosophy, his views were unearthly. 

” I’m not from stone, Utah,” he finally said. ” But I think you’re wrong about Samsara.” 

Before I could answer, the next question followed.

” What was there between you and Jeff?” 

Hearing the name of my long deceased friend made my insides turn to ice. Though sitting in front of a fire I suddenly felt cold shivers running down my spine. 

” What do you mean?” 

” It’s true, isn’t it? That’s why you mourned so much when he died. Because you two weren’t just friends.” 

My heart turned a somersault. What the hell? Not a single person in this world knew about my real relationship with Jeff. No one, just me and him. We were always very careful. He took this secret to the grave with him and I never told it to anyone. So how did Bodhi know about it? 

” What are you talking about, Bodhi? Jeff was like a brother to me, don’t you remember? I’ve told you before. ” 

His eyes were fixed on the fireplace. 

” A brother that you slept with.” 

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. The day Jeff died, I buried this part of my life. I plucked my attraction to men from my nature like weeds from a garden. I managed to look at women with desire.... or at least I thought so. For many years I trained myself to pay attention to the opposite sex only. I was into Samsara, I really was. And now it was all coming back to me as Bodhi talked. 

” You’ve got a screw loose, seriously,” I answered in my most sarcastic tone. 

” Do I really?” Bodhi asked, turning his head to face me. His brown eyes looked deep into mine. ” Who was he to you? A lover? A fling? Maybe just a one night stand?” 

I pressed my lips together, trying to keep my face calm. I knew he was waiting for an answer. 

” I’m not queer, if that’s what you’re implying.” 

Bodhi kept watching me with his face calm, his eyes staring deep into my soul. I remembered the way he looked at me the morning after he saved me from drowning, the train station in Paris, the evening before our first wing suit fly. I had a ghostly inkling that this man knew everything about my life. That made me furious. 

” Man, what do you want? You know I’m into Samsara. I’m completely in love with her!” 

” That’s a lie, Johnny. I’ve watched you and Samsara. She might be into you, but you’re definitely not into her. Your smile, your voice, the way you touch her, everything’s fake.” 

” You’re mad!” I got up from the sofa. As I walked past him I was worried he might try to grab me but he didn’t. ” I’m going to bed.” 

As I reached the door of the bedroom, I heard his voice again. It was quiet but loud enough for me to hear. 

” You know I’m not mad. You know I’m right, don’t you?” 

I lay on my bed, breathing heavily. Why did Bodhi talk about it now? How did he manage to dig out the darkest secrets from my past? Was it his way to make me pay for my betrayal, did he decide to hurt me emotionally instead of physically? Yes, he was right. But I wasn’t going to confirm it. I didn’t want anyone to know I’m gay. The comfort of this cabin now felt like a trap. If I were healthy enough and knew where the hell we were, I’d leave and never answer his embarrassing questions again. Now when he brought up this topic, it just wouldn’t leave my mind. I fell asleep thinking about Jeff and the moments we spent together secretly.


	3. The Night

After the strange talk with Bodhi I only managed to sleep for a few hours. I woke up in the middle of a night and couldn’t sleep anymore. Thousands of stars were scattered all over the dark blue sky and an enormous moon was shining brightly , filling the whole room with silver light. The nights were cold, clear and beautiful in the mountains. I thought about Jeff and remembered a camping trip that we had on a night very much like this. We were hiking, kissing by the bonfire and making love inside the tent. Those were the most precious memories of my life. His death made me heartbroken and empty and I suppressed everything concerning men. Because I was sure I could never love anyone like I loved Jeff. 

Damn bed that creaked with every movement I made! The door of my room opened. 

” What is it with you?” Bodhi leaned on the door frame. He was barefoot, dressed in plaid boxer shorts only. ” Why don’t you sleep?” 

” Just insomnia, I guess,” I replied weakly.

Bodhi sat on the side of the bed and put his palm on my forehead. His hand was pleasantly warm against my skin. 

” No fever,” he said, ” what’s keeping you up?” 

Due to the moonlight, his face looked a bit pale. I noticed the tiniest details about him. The freckles on his broad shoulders. The indentation on his chin, partly hidden by his facial hair. A few white hair here and there in his beard. His Adam’s apple moving lightly. The dark, silky hair on his chest. I wanted to arrest him...

My intense stare didn’t escape Bodhi’s notice. He touched my cheek lightly, his finger travelling over my lips and along my jawline. He mumbled something in Spanish. 

” What?” I asked.

” I said that you’re beautiful.” 

Bodhi bent and suddenly our lips met. My heart skipped a beat when I felt his bearded chin scratching my skin. His breath washed over my face, I could smell the sweet scent of cigarettes he was smoking. A hot prickling sweat sprang out on me as I freaked out. My legs were trembling even though I was lying down. 

” Stop!” 

” Calm down. It’s ok,” he whispered, as he went in for another try. 

” Stop it!” I pushed him away furiously and wiped my lips with the back of my hand. I couldn’t let anyone else take Jeff’s place. ” What the hell is wrong with you, I told you I’m not like that! What are you, a fag or something?” 

In one rapid movement Bodhi grabbed my throat and pushed me back into the pillows. 

” That’s how you thank me for saving your life again?” he hissed. ” You wanted to put me behind bars. Me of all people. I could’ve easily left you to die.” 

” Fuck you, man,” I tried to get his fingers off my throat. His iron grip was choking me. ” I’m into Samsara!” 

” Samsara?!” he asked incredulously. ” You’ve a short memory, my friend. Can you even count the times I’ve saved your ass? If it wasn’t for me, you’d be dead now. What has Samsara done for you, except letting you cry on her shoulder? Not one thing! And don’t give me that ” I’m not like that” shit, I know you! ” 

He released my neck. I breathed heavily, finally able to get some air into my lungs. Bodhi’s gaze softened. 

” I do, Utah. I know you. I’m not sure why you keep denying it. Just me and you here, no need to pretend.” 

His finger followed the lines of the tattoos on my chest. My desire for men was asleep and locked in a cage for many years already. His touches had awakened it and now it shook the lock wildly, desperately wanting to get out of its imprisonment. I knew that if I let it free, I’ll never be able to capture it again. It was incredibly hard the first time, this time it would be impossible. 

Bodhi kissed me again, roughly and aggressively. Our lips brushed together, his tongue looking for mine. My heart was racing and I moaned when his hands slid lower, under the blanket, under my underwear. 

” Bodhi...” I panted, digging my fingers into his shoulders, his hair that caressed my cheek as he kissed my neck. Every time his rugged cheeks scraped my skin, shivers run through my entire body. 

My inner beast was roaring in victory. I had let it starve for eternity. Now Bodhi was feeding it and it was getting stronger every second, ready to take revenge for all the years in captivity. 

Bodhi kicked away his boxer shorts and slid under the blanket. And when our naked bodies pressed together, I knew I had lost all the control. 

It was free. 

The need for another man flooded my body and my mind like an adrenaline. The image of Jeff vanished, replaced by Bodhi. It was all about Bodhi and Bodhi alone. We tangled together, embracing each other so tightly it hurt. I couldn’t imagine my world anymore without his hands, his lips, his hot breath on places where the skin on my body was the thinnest. He groaned in pleasure, muttering a chain of English and Spanish swear words. Our hearts were now beating equally fast, uniting in one frantic rhythm. 

I cried out loudly as I reached the maximum pleasure. I could do it, no one could hear us here. Bodhi took a little longer, gasping my name as he came, his face buried in the back of my neck.

Despite the cold night outside the window, we were sweating. I had already forgotten what making love with a man was like. Bodhi’s passionate nature engulfed me completely. And now it seemed only logical – we had a thing each for other, but someone always stood between us. Roach, Grommet, Samsara..... Jeff’s phantom. We could never spread our wings. Now everything was set free. I wondered if it could end well.


	4. Brothers

The following days were a repetition of three things only – eating, sleeping and sex. Uncountable times. We did nothing else but that. I couldn’t get enough of him and he was finally allowed to do what he wanted to do all along. After one of such times we were both lying on the rug in front of the fireplace, taking some rest from the breathtaking orgasm that we felt just a few minutes ago. My hand rested on his face, caressing everything in reach – his closed eyelids, his cheeks and chin. I scraped my fingers against his coarse beard. His lips, on the contrary, so soft, opened slightly as I touched them. I couldn’t keep my hands off him and he felt it. 

“ Long time without touching a man? ” 

I pressed my face to his neck. “ Too long. Ever since…”

I fell silent. I didn’t want to talk about Jeff now but Bodhi knew what I meant to say. 

“ I bet what you two had was beautiful. But it’s over. Wherever he might be, I’m sure he’d like you to be happy. ” 

“ And you’re my happiness? ” 

He smiled lightly and took my hand in his, our fingers twisted together.

” When did you fall for me?” I asked weakly, feeling completely drained after making love with him. 

” Straight away,” he answered with his voice quiet. Obviously he was just as drained. ” Why else did you think I tolerated all your caprices, your hesitations, your law-clouded mind? Why did I give you so many possibilities to make up your mind about what you really want? And I wouldn’t have sacrificed ” Life of Water” to pull you out of the ocean if you meant nothing to me.” 

I laid my head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat for a while. It never occurred to me. I thought I managed to trick Bodhi but he could always see to the real me. Even when he showed a great deal of patience with me, I never guessed the real reason behind that. I wasn’t good enough to be an FBI agent. I was too blind. I propped myself on my elbow to look into his eyes. 

” Do you actually mean to continue on the Ozaki 8?” 

” Yes, of course. Why?” 

” Bodhi,” I realized that I was probably talking for nothing, but I decided to give it a try. ” Are you sure about that? I know it’s what you want, but it’s highly dangerous. That fact that you completed the majority of the ordeals might just be pure luck.” 

He looked back at me.” Are you saying I’m not professional enough?” 

” No, all I’m saying is that... I’m afraid.” 

” Afraid?” Bodhi grinned, revealing his perfectly aligned teeth.” It’s strange to hear you talking about fear.” 

” Why is that?” 

” More balls than talent. Your reputation, Utah.” 

I put my head back on his chest. ” I’m not afraid about myself. I’m afraid about you. I almost lost my mind when Jeff died. It would be unbearable to lose you too.” 

Bodhi played with my hair, curling the blond strands around his fingers. 

” We’re all going to die, Johnny. The only question is how. I told you before.” 

Later that evening I was sitting at the kitchen table while Bodhi was serving the dinner. 

” Grommet and Roach will come this weekend,” he said while pouring us wine. ” Do you think you’re able to continue from where we left?” 

” I am, but.... I don’t think I want to see them.” 

” Where’s your courage, moto boy?” Bodhi smiled. ” Don’t worry. No one will harm you, I won’t allow it.” 

We finished the dinner, but these news had ruined my appetite. I managed to eat the most of my meal, though it wasn’t an easy thing to do. Every bite stuck in my throat and in the end I wasn’t even sure what was it we were eating. I got up, ran the water in the sink and began to wash our dishes. Just a few seconds later I felt Bodhi’s body pressing against my back. 

” Can’t it wait till the morning?” 

” No,” I answered stubbornly, ” I don’t want to wake up in a pigsty.” 

Bodhi slid his hands down my arms, trying to take the kitchen sponge out of my hands. I felt his erection grinding against my butt. I swallowed a moan. 

” This is one of the last days you treat me like this, right?” 

” What do you mean?” 

I squeezed the sponge in my fist. ” Surely you’re not going to do this with Roach and Grommet around.” 

He buried his head into the crook of my neck as he covered my neck with small kisses. ” No, but I’ll find a way to still get close to you. ” 

Bodhi’s patience ended when he noticed me still washing the dishes. He snatched the sponge out of my hands and roughly turned me around. I knew this playful flame in his eyes. That meant he was not going to wait any longer. He pushed everything left on the table to the floor, the table things jingled loudly as they fell. Before I could check if anything broke, Bodhi pushed me on the table, his fingers fumbling with the buttons of my shirt impatiently. We made love right in that kitchen, the only place in this house where we hadn’t done it yet. 

As Bodhi promised, Roach and Grommet arrived on Sunday. He went out of the cabin to meet them and I followed him cautiously. They were both carrying large backpacks on their shoulders and looked pretty exhausted, probably because of the long climb. However the moment they saw me, they recovered instantly. 

” What the hell is he doing here?” Grommet snarled, taking a few steps towards me. I could see he was ready to kill me. 

” No need to do anything stupid, ” Bodhi was by my side. ” Johnny knows now which side is he on.” 

” Oh does he? Did the FBI kick his ass out or something ?” Roach asked with hostility, shaking his backpack off his shoulders. ” We’ve got no place for rats, Bodhi.” 

” Remember what you and me talked about before you judge him, Roach,” Bodhi said. 

I had no idea what had they talked about, but obviously it was something serious, as it made Roach to stop his comments. 

” Come on, guys,” Bodhi waved for us to approach.” We’ve got much more serious things to think about. We have to finish what we started, that’s what we need to focus on now. We’re brothers. We have to keep together. Things like these cannot tear us apart.” 

All four of us hugged. Unfortunately, I knew it was too late. Roach and Grommet never spoke ill of me to my face again, but their glares were cutting into me like knives. I knew I could never call them brothers again. 

Later that night I was alone in my room. Without Bodhi, my bed was too big and too cold. Now that Roach and Grommet were here now, we couldn’t sleep together anymore, so Bodhi rested on the sofa next to the fireplace. The more I thought about it, the more frustrated I got. I wanted them gone. Our relationship was damaged beyond repair, I knew that. There were things they just didn’t forgive and right now their presence denied me Bodhi’s attention. 

After sleeping for a little while I was awoken by voices not far away from my door. I sat up in my bed and listened in. 

” You’re not serious about this, are you?” 

” I told you to calm down.” 

” What do you mean – calm down? He’s a damn cop, Bodhi! He almost got all of us in the clink! He lied to us! He only pretended to be on the same path as we are!” 

” He is on the same path as we. Haven’t you seen it? He never was a real FBI agent.” 

” So you want to take the risk? To hope that his brain is in the right place now? We have too much to lose, we should just end with him!” 

” Never say anything like that again, do you hear me?” 

” What is going on with you, Bodhi, I don’t know you anymore! Before he came, you were ready to get rid of anything standing between us and the Ozaki 8. He betrayed our loyalty. Why do you defend him so much?” 

” Listen to me, brother. Don’t make me choose between you and him because it’ll be him. You’ve got your way figured out. He hasn’t yet and I’m going to help him.” 

The two talkers were Bodhi and Grommet. I put my head back on the pillow and wondered whether or not Grommet will suspect anything about my relationship with Bodhi. They hated me and wanted me out of their circle as fast as possible. Even though Grommet and Roach were never too dear to me, I could understand them. They were afraid that my being here with them is just another undercover FBI case and they might not be so lucky this time. I wished I could prove them wrong. I thought about continuing on the Ozaki 8 together with them. It won’t bring any satisfaction if I’ll have to tolerate their rage. I felt like a small child hiding behind Bodhi’s back. Even he couldn’t be with me at all times. They were patient and they knew how to wait. For some reason I was sure I needed to prepare myself for their revenge.


	5. Two Against The World

The atmosphere in our cabin grew more and more unpleasant every day. Roach showed us a piece of paper that he had torn from some building on his way to this cabin. It was an announcement from the FBI. Together with my photo, name and physical characterization it said "missing". This confirmed something that I had already wondered about - the FBI was still looking for me.

Grommet and Roach didn’t talk to me at all and Bodhi followed their actions carefully. Especially after they tried to kill me. Before continuing on Ozaki Eight, Grommet suggested that we should all go skydiving for fun. After picking out the highest peak of the mountains, just before the jump Bodhi noticed something wrong about my parachute. It was packed in a way that would prevent it from opening and ensure my death.

This made Bodhi to literary lose his mind and fight both Roach and Grommet. That turned into a violent and bloody mess. He was ready to fight his brothers in order to protect me. That’s how much I meant to him.

Not long after this incident Roach and Grommet confronted Bodhi. They had decided to leave us.

” I’m sorry, Bodhi,” Roach said,” you know I’ve always respected you a lot but this is different. You can’t have both him and us. And I suppose you’ve chosen already.”

Bodhi was playing with his cigarette. ” I have. I just thought better of both of you. Have you forgotten everything Ozaki taught?”

” Ozaki never taught that betrayal is something that should be accepted. We’ll be better on our own than share our lives with this.... this,” Grommet gave me a quick, hateful look.

They left soon after. Bodhi spent a lot of time watching the direction they went. They were his brothers long before me.

” I’m sorry,” I nudged him with my head, ” it’s my fault.”

” It’s not your fault, brother. Their path is their choice that we cannot be responsible for. We’ll just have to finish this on our own.”

It was just the two of us against the world. The following ordeals we completed together. And every time I felt like this ordeal was the last one for me. Even with all of Bodhi’s encouragement I didn’t feel prepared for this. If Bodhi knew my fears, he would’ve said this wasn’t my path. And he would probably be right. But I couldn’ t leave him alone with this, I was ready to die with him. With no ropes, no harnesses, no second chance we climbed the rocky Angel Falls and jumped down into the foamy water underneath to complete Master of Six Lives and Act of Ultimate Trust. And just as my head submerged under the water, Bodhi was there to pull me out with nothing but a few bruises on him. Sometimes it seemed like he couldn’t get hurt at all.

However the biggest challenge was repeating Life of Water. I spoiled it the first time he tried and chose to save me rather than finish the ordeal. We had to wait more than a year for a proper wave to come. And when it did, it wasn’t easy to get to it. Both chased by the FBI, we traveled to the Pacific Ocean secretly. A storm generated massive waves there. Hundred feet. More. The ocean itself seemed to help us, it carried our boat right towards where the greatest waves were born.

It was terrifying. The sky was black and blue, the biting wind splashed water into our boat and rocked it badly, our skin burned when the freezing rain stung it and the ocean roared so loudly we could barely hear each other’s voice.

Bodhi’s eyes sparkled in admiration.

” Isn’t that beautiful?” he screamed while pointing to the majestic, large mountains of water crashing into white foam right there in front of our eyes. ” Isn’t that beautiful, brother?”

He reached for my hand and shook it.

” See you soon, Utah.”

Only then I understood that this was a suicide. We weren’t going to return. We got no PFDs, we were 150 miles from shore. No one would ever find us lost in this grave of water. I didn’t mind dying with him. I kissed him tightly for the last time before we dropped our raincoats and plunged into the black water with our surfboards.

I wondered what we looked like from the shore. Two fragile human figures fighting walls of water, giants trying to devour us. I concentrated on the figure of Bodhi in front of me and by some miracle, we were almost done. Maybe we won’t die today after all, I thought as the force of the wave ripped the board from under my feet. The little air I had in my lungs slowly escaped, my windpipe burned, I needed to breathe. As hard as I tried, I couldn’t emerge. A series of moments of my life ran in front of my eyes like movie stills – my career as an extreme athlete, meeting Jeff, his death, joining the FBI and finally – meeting Bodhi. The last thing I saw before tumbling down into the depths of the ocean, was Bodhi’s dark wetsuit.

Suddenly the black water and howling wind were replaced by a total, almost frightening silence and bright light. It was the brightest and the most beautiful light I had ever seen. Strangely, as bright as it was, it wasn’t dazzling me. I could see everything clearly. I was still at the beach, standing on the shore. My clothes were dry and the ocean was calm, too calm. The beach, light and beautiful, was empty. A wonderful peacefulness and harmony wrapped themselves around me. I couldn’t see Bodhi anywhere. Before I could freak out about what was happening, I felt a hand lying down on my shoulder and I turned around swiftly. 

In front of me there was _Jeff _. My jaw tightened, I couldn’t believe my eyes. He looked exactly as I remembered him, dressed in the same motorcycling clothes he was wearing that fateful day. Yet something was different about him. He was radiant, embraced in the same brilliance that surrounded everything. Slowly I reached for him, expecting my hand to go right through him as if he was a ghost, an apparition. But my fingers met his chest, a living body, the fabric of his clothes. He was real. I could only imagine one reason as to why I was seeing him.__

____

____

” Am I dead? ”

” Not quite.” He smiled. That was the smile I loved, cheerful and roguish at the same time. ” I’m so proud of you. Ozaki’s ordeals.” 

” I wish you’d be here to experience it with me.” 

” That’s why I needed you to meet me one more time. I’ve been watching you ever since that bike ride and you don’t know how much it hurt me to see you like that. You quit your life completely. You quit everything that made you you. Because of me, Utah?”

I didn’t take my eyes off him. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. My first love, my first boyfriend, my dead boyfriend. My memory brought me back to the moment that shattered my world seven years ago and I saw everything as clearly as if it was happening now. Me standing on a lone stone column, waving for Jeff to come. He jumps, overspeeds and falls to his death. It was the life that was ripped from me. Pain washed through me as I asked him a question, a question that needed an answer for seven years. 

” Why?” 

” There’s no why. It just happened and you’ve to accept it.” 

Our foreheads touched as I held his face in my hands. I was scared to let him go, that he might disappear into thin air. Desperately I looked into his eyes. 

” Take me with you. That’s why you’re here, right? You’ll take me with you.” 

Jeff smiled sadly and shook his head, his eyes fixed on something behind my shoulder. When I turned my head, the stillness of this beach was gone. As in the distance I saw the roaring ocean, the dark sky and the gruesome high waves. I saw my own body lying on the shore and leaned over me there was Bodhi. I couldn’t hear his voice but by the language of his body I could tell he was distraught. He was shaking me, massaging my chest and putting his lips on my lips. But I knew he wasn’t kissing me. He was trying to bring me back to life. 

Jeff looked back at me. “ You want to leave him like that?” 

I watched Bodhi still continuing on CPR. I wondered when would he stop. After five minutes? Ten? Fifteen? No, he wouldn’t. I knew that if there was even the slightest possibility of bringing me back, he’d never stop saving me. I looked back at Jeff. He was gazing into my eyes, as if attempting to put the right decision into my mind. 

” He loves you. He might never say it out loud but he loves you and he needs you very much. Believe me when I say that before you came, he had nothing at all to care for. You might very well be the best thing that has ever happened to him.” 

I took his hand into mine. He was real, so real it was hard to realize that he was actually dead. And I was too. At least for now. Jeff caressed my hair and looked deep into my eyes. 

“ Let me go, Johnny. Once and for all. I’m fine. Stop scourging yourself about something that was completely out of your control. My time came that day. And when your time comes, I promise I’ll be there to get you. Not now. Not today.” He looked at Bodhi. ” Love him and let him love you.”

Jeff came closer, his lips touched my cheek softly and unexpectedly I was falling. The bright light moved further and further away from me, the peace and silence vanished. I was falling from the somber sky, through the stormy ocean, the waves crashing around me without harming me at all. I felt very light, as if I didn’t have any weight at all. The rain, the wind, the waves flowed together into one sound, a voice that became clearer and clearer as I flew in an unimaginable speed, ready to hit the ground.

” Breathe! Come on, Utah! Breathe!”

My eyes snapped open and my body hurt which assured me I was not dead. I was cold. My breathing was wet and my mouth salty. It felt like my lungs were full of saltwater that I exhaled back into my mouth. Bodhi was hovering over me, his hand on my chest as if he was trying to feel my heartbeat. I was on the shore, the wet grains of sand stung my hands and face. I was alive. I was back.

I started to cough, pushing the water out of my body. When I sat up, the storm was still mauling the ocean.

Bodhi hugged my shoulders.

” We made it,” he whispered into my wet, sandy hair.

” Did we?” I asked doubtfully.

” Yeah. You only lost your balance near the very end.”

I was quiet, still tasting the salt in my mouth. We were surfing miles from shore. How could we get out like that? Was it really the ocean or was it Jeff?

” I never thought we were going to get out alive.”

” Neither did I. But the ocean decides for itself. Apparently it didn’t want us and gave us back to the Earth. I dive in, got you and just let the waves carry us to the shore.”

So that was it. The last ordeal. However I couldn’t believe in the good will of the ocean. As we left the beach, I took one last look at it. It still roared loudly in dissatisfaction that we had escaped. Jeff was gone. Forever.

After completing all of the Ozaki’s ordeals Bodhi’s personality changed a little. He became more harmonious and peaceful. His mind was not in a stress anymore, he didn’t have to constantly figure out new ways how to avoid the police and still follow Ozaki’s teachings. We returned to our remote mountain cabin and continued with our lives together. Yes, we were both still wanted by the FBI. I was a missing person, he was a criminal and they were definitely still looking for us. I doubted they’ll ever stop but Bodhi knew other places where we could hide, if necessary.

Sometimes I thought about Grommet and Roach. I wasn’t mad at them for trying to kill me. I understood them, I felt what they were feeling. All of us had extreme hearts. I wondered if they also managed to complete the Eight.

Even though we had completed the Eight, Bodhi and I didn’t give up extreme sports. We were just more cautious about doing it. We had too much to lose after all – each other.


End file.
